Gusty Blusts

and other stories The Weird and Wonderful World of "J"
Approx 264 words | Read time approx 1 - 2 mins

The trouble with teenagers

Phone receiver

Washing and chips – a stranger calls with some seriously irrational demands . . .

ANSWERING THE phone I was met with a not-so-cheery greeting in the form of ‘took your time didn’t you?’ from what sounded like an overly-excited teenager.

‘Er . . .’ I just about managed to mumble before being interrupted with ‘come on, come on – wake up will you?!’ and wondered if I’d slipped into yet another bad dream boot camp.

‘I think you’ve got the wrong number!’ I finally managed to say while wondering what the check out times of my bad dream were.
‘No, I haven’t – stop messing me around!’
‘Well, who do you want to speak to?’ I tried again only to be met by an audible sigh and ‘Duh! You – who do you think?! Are you stupid or sommat?’ That’s as maybe, but it wasn’t exactly something I wanted to enter into a discussion about on the phone with a complete stranger.

‘WHO is it you think you’re talking to?’ I tried again although couldn’t help feeling overly-optimistic about crediting them with the ability to think.
‘You – me mother of course – stupid!’

‘Er, no, I’m not your mother!’ I said thinking I’d probably remember if I was the mother of a stroppy teenager ‘you’ve got the wrong number . . .’
‘So you’re not me mother then?!’
‘Whatever – you’ll do instead!’
‘What?!’ How kind.
‘Will yer wash and iron me jeans and me best pink top fer me – oh and can I have some money for some chips?’

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