Gusty Blusts

and other stories The Weird and Wonderful World of "J"
Approx 194 words | Read time approx 1 - 2 mins

Tractor tales

Phone receiver

Strange country bloke calls and offers a ride on his tractor . . .

ANSWERING THE PHONE I was met with what sounded like a bearded man with a heavy west country accent demanding to know whether I had any ‘luv-ver-lee tractors?’

‘Er, no’ I said before telling him that he’d obviously got the wrong number. Although the response of ‘no I haven’t – I’m talking to you aren’t I?’ wasn’t the kind of logic I wanted to hear.

‘But I don’t have any tractors – lovely or otherwise’ I said before telling him to try the farmhouse instead.

‘Oh!’ He said sounding a little downhearted before quickly recovering with ‘well, nevermind I have – would you like to see them?’

‘Er, no, no, you’re alright thanks!’ I said whilst wandering once again into the realms of why me?

‘Oh, well would you like to come and have a ride on one of my luv-ver-lee tractors then?’

‘Er, no, no, you’re alright thanks!’ I said again wondering whether this guy was for real.

‘Are you sure?’ he said ‘I’m sure you’ll enjoy it – I know I certainly will!’

‘What? Goodbye!’

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4 Responses to “Tractor tales”

  1. 1
    scripto says:

    You missed a treat there – lol! 😉

  2. 2
    Paul Chant says:

    You alt to get down to Somerset then my loverly!, everyone has got a Tractor down here and you are always welcome to have a ride on one, Tractor that is!!! ;O)

  3. 3
    J says:

    Hmmmm … possibly the best offer I’ve had so far today … no wait… 😉

  4. 4
    scripto says:

    Poor guy was probably lonely and was looking for a play mate – you know, the type that didn’t have 4 wheels and look like a tractor… roflmao 🙂

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